According to Walter Sobchak, Jesus is a molester who got sentenced six months at Chino for exposing himself to an eight year old. He became a bowling rival to the Dude, Walter and Donny. He likes yelling at the three and they hesitated when he talks to them.
- "Are you ready to be f**ked, man? I see you rolled your way into the semis. Dios Mio, man. Liam and me, we're gonna f**k you up."
- "Let me tell you something, pendejo. You pull any of your crazy s**t with us, you flash a piece out in the lanes. I'll take it away from you and stick it up your *ss and pull the f**king trigger 'til it goes click."
- "You said it, man. Nobody f**ks with the Jesus."
- "Hey! What's this day of rest s**t?! What's this bulls**t!? I don't f**king care! It don't matter to Jesus. You don't fool me, man. You might fool the f**ks in the league office, but you don't fool Jesus. This bush league psyche out stuff. Laughable, man! HA HA! I would have f**ked you in the *ss Saturday. I'll f**k you in the *ss next Wednesday instead. WOO! You got a date Wednesday, baby!"